Anyone Want to Buy a Bridge from Fox News ?

I believe Fox News, they are a credible news outlet.

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Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!!!!!

No Fool Like an Old Fool

This one is such an awesome piece of lunacy I am almost at a loss where it begins. I guess let's start with Bud Adams the owner of the NFL's Tennessee Titans who is 86 years old, a spry, bird flipping thing compared to Bills' nonagenarian owner Ralph Wilson. First of all, Bud Adams rolls like this :



The packaging alone is an outrage. Between the grandma blouse buttoned to the top a la class nerd style, the powder blue pimp jacket and Perez Hilton's shades this guy looks like trouble with a capital poli-grip.
Ordinarily such hubris as flipping off one's foe is reserved for the rec room of a senior living center but this past Sunday Bud got his mojo on to hang out the window of his people proof owner's box and throw a little single digit tai chi in the Bills' wounds which were all ready in evidence on the scoreboard.

Better yet, when the media failed to light a fire under Skeletaur Jauron with T.O. questions they turned this one on him asking what he thought about the guy giving the Bills the bird. Ever mindful to avoid that sound byte that will result in a For Sale sign on his lawn, Jauron reasoned, "If he did it he probably had a good reason to do it." What ?!!! Oh, this just in, Dick could have said anything he wanted about TO or Buddy Boy since Ralph just shitcanned him anyway.

Here's Bud throwing down on all things Bills by the way :

Carrie Prejean, Sarah Palin Light, and Dumber than a Clinique Gift With Purchase

Remember Miss California of the "I think marriage is a man and a woman and I think gay people ummm, such as, in the Iraq, errrr, I can see Mexico from California, errrr... The delightfully persecuted Ms. Carrie Prejean has surfaced again as a true follower of Michelle Bachman and her professed hero, Sarah Palin. The poor little blonde girl was rightfully hammered by the thinking part of America for her boorish and backwards take on gay relations and marriage in the The Trump's Miss USA pageant. Why some bimbo in heels and a bikini stuffed with yet to be paid for implants has any business opining on how Americans live their lives is still something of a conumdrum to many of us but such is the zany world of beauty pageantry. So it turns out she is first defended by the Combover Don but even he soon sickens of her and the goon limo is dispatched to snatch the crown back off her head. Good thing she'd started making payments on that freshly installed rack of hers Lord knows what Vinny and Little Nick might have done in the name of a repo job. Our girl is embraced by right wing wackos, hateful Christian groups, the far right static of am radio and of course, Fox news who never met a brain dead sanctimonious bozette they didn't like. The charade goes just so far and whammo. Now the dear has some problems again. One of them stems from her fetish for sending videos of herself masturbating to a guy she met on MySpace and spent all of 4 days with pretty much never leaving a San Diego hotel room for the duration of her splay, errrr, stay. And just before TMZ gets a chance to bust her she calls the dude and asks him to lie and say she was underage when they were shot )thus preventing TMZ from showing them to anyone and again giving her a little booster shot of victimhood the way most of Hollywood is having their collagen lips touched up. But alas our man says screw that. Why should he stand up as some sicko who encourages underage girls to jingle their change for him ? In his view all CJ has to do is own her half and say Yeah I was 20 when I did that so I guess I have nobody to blame but myself. Were it ever so easy over on Right Wing Acres though. SO what does she do but run out to hold Hannity's sweaty hand and from there to runs to kindly old Larry King. This is where it gets funny, interesting and balls out the window bizarre friends. I'll leave it to your viewing pleasure. But remember this is a girl who preached about morals and the bible and what's right and wrong between consenting adults. She has quite a bit to say about how we all should behave but somehow has, in the grand hypocrital tradition of the GOP and its minions, excused herself from following the rules she sets down for the rest of us. Priceless....

Chris Collins CEO of Erie County Does It Again

A female county social worker wrote the following to the Buffalo News regarding the policy of our former private sector CEO County Executive Chris Collins :

I am a caseworker for Erie County. On a daily basis we are required to knock on doors in neighborhoods where I doubt the county executive or any of his inner circle would set foot alone. Certainly I don’t believe he would want his wife or other relatives visiting some of the neighborhoods we must frequent for our jobs. Yet we are also someone’s wife, mother, daughter, husband, father, son. Collins’ cell phone policy for us has been if a cell phone is not utilized for a certain number of calls per month, our units cannot have them. Prior administrations saw the necessity of cell phones for caseworkers for safety reasons. We may not use them every day, but there is safety and security in knowing we have them if we need to use them to help us in some of the situations we encounter, again as part of our daily jobs. A policy of cell phone use such as we have now may make economic sense in a business environment, but it does not in the world of casework. In social service casework, it is a dangerous policy.
Carolyn Kirsch
Tonawanda

WOW.

Taking the "Let's Run It Like a Business" mantra to its reductio absurdam conclusion I have come to see how the exec can save even more money using his Monty Pythonesque logic and a little creative interpolation. How's this : Any County Sheriff whose service weapon hasn't been fired in the past month loses it. What's the point of having a Glock if you never use it ? Overcrowding at the Holding Center can also be reduced with the CEO's logic wand : Any inmate who hasn't raped, arsoned, assaulted, check frauded, burglarized etc since being incarcerated should be turned loose. Imagine the cred this would garner CC with that union hating contingent who simply cry bloody tears when the holding center sheriffs are paid overtime...And what the heck, if it doesn't snow every day for 2 weeks straight let's mothball those snowplows and call it good government. Again working guys would be screwed out of overtime and CEO guys could whoop it up over cigars and whatever it is they drink.

On a more serious note, does this jackass realize that caseworkers get murdered by clients ? Not in Baghdad or Beirut but in Buffalo. According to one county recruitment advertisement her salary pays somewhere between $37885 to $49928 for a level 2.A level 1 only earns from $32843 to $42841. Is that enough money to lose your life at work ? Raise your hand if this is what you were looking for when this guy said he was going to Run It Like a Business.

Topless Dancing Fan Loses His Shirt, Self Respect and 15K

Is this a cautionary tale for the early 21st or what ? Orchard Park man (yes, the same burg recently busted for obstructing low income senior housing) wins it big at the casino 15K to be precise. Does he race home and call his money guy about getting in on this down market while prices are affordable ? Did he call his cousin about getting the damned roof done finally ? Did he pay off his car loan on the '07 Malibu ? No friends, our big winner took his caaaysh and went directly to Club Chit Chat in the armpit of Kaisertown, NY where he proceeded to live large for all of, well, that's where it gets a little fuzzy. Long story short, our man wakes up 15 thousand lighter in a house on Smith St. which according to google maps is not in Orchard Park. He claims he was drugged at the bar. The pre-existing aphorisms for a case like this are seemingly endless but I think the one that begins " A fool and his money..." covers it best. Just for the sake of research I looked up Club Chit Chat and found some amazing reviews of the place. Maybe our high roller ought to do some online research before he picks the place to party next time he hits at the Casino. These customer reviews are worth the cover charge, which, surprisingly, is nothing. I decided against linking to them as I am trying to keep this thing somewhere between a PG 13 and an R rating...

Wow, what a horrible i mean could not believe one dancer ate chips on stage unbelievable i could wack myself more than watch her, 3 times your out of it, heard way better than this. I went in there to get some drinks...

What a mistake walking in the door here. This place used to be half way decent back over ten years ago when they served lunch in a rather pleasant environment. It appeared that they have done little to nothing to improve since my last visit,

oh, i don't think so...surprised this place is still open, but heard a former acquaintance of mine might be stripping there so I stopped in. Should have known she wouldn't have sunk this low-what a dive, even worse than I remembered, zero entertainment value.

this is the worst run club in the western new york area. the management is of the lowest class.although this at one time was a fun and livly place to spend time.the new management has turn this place into a waste of anybodys time

Horrible! Horrible! It's been remodeled inside and looks nicer, but the dancers were really horrible. This place used to have good 10 laps but now it's 20 and the girls are really 1-2 at best. One girl had a hip replacement.

What's funnier than irate strip club goers feeling hard done by in their search for the perfect strip club experience ? I love the way they try to articulate their grievance as if it's any sort of legitimate activity we all relate to in our daily grind. I am not sure if the girl eating chips on-stage or the stripper with the hip replacement is more amazing (does she get an AARP drink discount or offer one on lap dances ?) I suppose there's one more trite little maxim we could toss on the pile here, one that may even bring some relief to Orchad Park's biggest loser. How about the one that says easy come easy go ? No pun intended either, pervs.

Afflicted Official Brian Davis Plays Hide n Seek with Investigators at City Hall

Try to garnishee this, Bitches !

Councilman Brian Davis is a piece of work. If Shakespeare had met Brian Davis I think he'd have been obliged to make that statement a little stronger. As a city councilman Davis swiped funds meant for his district and slid them under the table to prop up One Sunset, the upscale eatery to nowhere whose proprietor refused to be arrested and had the balls to make the cops wait while he put a call in to Mayor Brown's office. Sadly, his stunt worked and the cops were told to bring him to City Hall where he'd be released into mayoral custody. (picture the young kid sticking his tongue at at his fuming older sister as Mommy rescues him) Yeah the small town cross eyed nature of this story rivals some of Appalachia's more frighteningly shallow and murky gene pools.

A Buffalo News investigation in April disclosed that Davis had been embroiled in numerous financial problems. He had been the target of 10 liens and lawsuits. His campaign accounts had been frozen, his wages garnisheed and his driver's license suspended.
Daaaaay-yummmmmmm Dude, that's pretty gangster shit for an elected official.

Davis was also the target of controversy involving an ill-fated restaurant that received city and county subsidies. Davis shifted block grant funds earmarked for his district to assist One Sunset, a restaurant that was in the Delaware District. Later, a building owner who leased space to One Sunset said Davis wrote him a $3,500 check to cover some rent at the restaurant, but the check bounced.

Not until Davis rubber checked Kevin Brinkworth did it seem any of his antics were going to come to anyone's attention. Brinkworth hauled his ass into court for the money and the story grew even weirder. A local musician gave Davis cash to cover the month's rent at One Sunset yet somehow Davis paid it off with a check that failed to clear. Forget mentioning how east and west side corner store owners were also stiffed with bad checks from this guy but knew better than to make a fuss because they feared he could have their permits jerked around or their stores shut down in retaliation for making him pay his debts. Now as the net is closing in Davis keeps his game alive avoiding anyone who wants to ask him an uncomfortable question. The investigator's biggest mistake I think was staking out his committee meetings thinking they had him. Why the hell would he be at those ? Attending work related committee meetings is not how this cat rolls.. While Carl Paladino's latest radio rants alludes to Davis soon to be frolicking in a prison shower -- nice work there CP -- I wouldn't expect that to be a done deal anytime soon, not in this city and not with his connections. What's happened to him so far ?

More Fun Righty Posters from Bachman's Teaparty Overdrive

Enjoy this recent sampling of what the Beck/Limbaugh droids are scribbling and crayoning on their posterboards. These were taken from a Thursday hatefest on Capitol Hill promoted by Guano Loco Bachman herself. Bachman's Teabaggers really came out to show their stuff. Stay in school, kids...





The Right Wing Loons are the true Big Tenters. They embrace all slurs against the president whether it's calling him a Nazi or a Maoist they all agree to disagree that he's something they dislike even if they are too stupid or uninformed to articulate it.


They love phrases like Maoism. Do you think any of these Fulbright fellows could explain what the Long March or The Great Leap Forward were all about ?
Mmmmm ... me either.


Again the loons display their pre-adolescent fascination with drawing on people's faces. Nice touch here with the gun on the bottom of the page. Also important to note that the bill is aimed at wrecking your health care not providing it for people who can't get it. Why let the truth cloud a great poster ?


And what would a gathering of the tinfoil kufi society be without some anal references and a classic misspelling of hemorrhoid ? Appears Mr. 50 Something was so caught up in his own cleverness that he had to keep the two words together even if he only bothered to spell check the first one. Was Msr. Latrec as concerned about the 10 billion we were spending on KBR, Blackwater and Paul Bremer every month or did he just consider that amount a flesh wound not a hemorrhage ?



Of course you do, bless your heart. Please tell the class which exact tenets of Mao's teachings you have observed in President Obama's actions on health care ? Silence of a thousand fox news brain cells melting into paste through over exertion. Now go get a copy of The Little Red Book, read it and we'll talk.



This one is a little iffy but look closely at the bottom and you'll see the time worn phrase NAZI GERMANY ! which of course is where Mao the Maoist ruined all of those German lives and served soup to people with Nazi chop sticks. James Thurber, it has been said, could not draw but did anyway.I see a parallel here with this crew in that they can't think or speak clearly or coherently but that doesn't stop them.

New York's 23rd Posterboy Gets Spanked

When Limbaugh and Beck decided to flex their muscles and get one of their stooges elected they circled the globe and landed their pushpin on New York's 23rd congressional district. Doug Hoffman, clueless and propped up to be a real blood and gutser's conservative was placed in position to bump the more moderate Republican candidate Dede Scozzafava out of the way. Turns out she dropped out over the weekend and threw her support to the Democrat Bill Owens who went on to win the seat. What's typically Talk Show Hostish about this whole mess is the way they landed this guy in the area and did virtually no homework on the issues or what was making folks tick. It was clear to Hoffman's handlers that all he had to do was show up and not be moderate and lemmings would follow him off a cliff to the voting booths. Didn't happen. What's even better is the local paper held a little press event for him. Hoffman was completely ignorant about issues the constituency would be most interested in. Regardez :

Douglas L. Hoffman, the Conservative Party candidate for the 23rd Congressional District, showed no grasp of the bread-and-butter issues pertinent to district residents in a Thursday morning meeting with the Watertown Daily Times editorial board. In a nearly hour-long session, Mr. Hoffman was unable to articulate clear positions on a number of matters specific to Northern New Yorkers rather than the national level campaign being waged in a three-way race for the vacant seat of now-Army Secretary John McHugh. Mr. Hoffman spoke only generally about the need to improve the country's economy and to create jobs but provided no details, which were also lacking as well in his broadly stated willingness to help our military personnel. Help in what way he could not say. Regarding the proposed rooftop highway across the top of the district linking Watertown to Plattsburgh, Mr. Hoffman said only that he was open to studying the idea that has been around for years and will require federal financial assistance to complete. Mr. Hoffman had no opinion about winter navigation and widening the St. Lawrence Seaway with their potential environmental damage. He was not familiar with the repercussions of a proposed federal energy marketing agency for the Great Lakes, which could pay for Seaway expansion contrary to district interests.

When Hoffman realized he was here for an interrogation by real people and not a coronation by mouth foaming Beckophiles and Limbaughnauts he became peevish and said he should have been given the questions ahead of time. The editorial board responded that he might have bothered reading the paper's editorials from the previous day where all of the questions and issues were laid out. As if to ice this turd cake with the sulphurous stench of misguided far rightism, lobbyist whore Dick Armey did a drive-by to defend his poster boy dismissing the concerns of the locals as "parochial issues" that would ultimately waif no balm with the imaginary voting block that was going to catapult Hoffman into the shitbird seat. As David Brooks (of all people) pointed out a few weeks back in the Times : Limbaugh (and Beck) are giants of the media world but in the real world they are not. Scoreboard, guys. You lost again.

Afghanistan Imitates Bush

So much for the winds of Democracy whipping Afghanistan into shape. While it took a private full Nelson from John Kerry just to get Hamid Karzai's admission that he rigged the last election, the world is stuck with him again since his only opponent has called the runoff just as fake as the original election and opted out of participating in another farcical ballot box stuffing. And while we're at it the recent outing of Karzai's brother Wali, as living large off the CIA's dime isn't doing much for the case of legitimizing the current regime. Worse still is the common belief that Karzai's brother, aka Pablo Escobar in a turban, either controls or at the very least profits heavily from the Afghan opium trade which has rivaled Exxon's profit margins for the past few years. Add the popular understanding that Hamid Karzai's introduction as a leader of this country came by way of his service to Unocal as a petroleum executive in position to lay some serious pipe across the country. Would the FOX Newzers still like us to ship another 40,000 of our fighting men and women their to support a shiftless regime lead by a failed oil man (sound familiar ?) with an overeager brother looking to cash in off his big bro's successes ? (sound familiar again friends ? - google Neil's attempts to sell edumaterials on the back of NCLB) This isn't a country who deserves another 10 American soldiers let alone 40K of them.

Chris Collins Prematurely Ends His Political Career

Erie County Executive Chris Collins has yet again demonstrated what happens when a CEO is turned loose in society without the requisite social skills for public speaking. In what he's calling "a poor joke" Collins compared New York State Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver to Hitler and the antichrist while speaking to fellow Republicans at the county's annual fundraiser. The fact that Silver is an orthodox Jew apparently never crossed the C.E.O.'s mind as he trolled for cheap laughs and got instead a nervous and horrified twitter from assembled G.O.Peeps. When Collins campaigned using that same old tired saw " we're going to run it like a business," I would like to say I saw this coming. Chris Collins knows how to run a business from the top down as a C.E.O. and is accustomed to saying what he thinks without contradiction. Unlike the private sector the business of politics comes with microphones and recorders where your moronic babble will be gleefully used against you sometimes by your own party. Collins I believe still thinks he's running the show from his corner office shooting from the hip with dumb unfunny jokes that his flunkies would have had to force a laugh at. This time people instead gasped and shook their heads, at least did the handful of savvy Republicans who knew how this was going to reverberate across the Empire State. One consultant from Manhattan described Collins' gaffe thusly : "Never mind the anti-Semitic content he said. It makes him look nuts, and it doesn't add to the discussion." So much for being Rotten Rudi's running mate for Governor Chris, now that you've shown yourself to be a backwards anti-semitic rube from Buffalo NY.

Taos NM Refuses Executive Orders

What if your boss changed your name and told you not to speak the language you were raised speaking around him ? After dropping 2 million on a run down hotel at the base of the Sangre de Christo mountains, Larry Whitten, 63, declared himself to be the new sheriff. The little town of Taos NM does not suffer fools gladly and before long employees were fired and protestors appeared across the street picketing this gringo loco and his pre-civil war version of management. What's amazing about this story is that the guy claims to have been successful at turning around failing hotels for the past 40 years but has never learned anything about Spanish culture or how to work respectfully within it even in places like Florida, South Carolina, Oklahoma and his home state of Texas. Whitten banned spoken Spanish out of fear his employees were talking about him. Hasn't he learned enough Spanish in Texas to know that he is in fact el pinche jefe y un cabron blanco y tonto ? Spend a day in a west Side school in Buffalo and you can learn the swear words for openers. Yet somehow, this payasso has managed to protect his white boss ignorance for 40 years to the point that he's so paranoid his workers are trashing him that he'd order them to speak English rather than try to speak with them or listen to them. If ever there was the wrong town for an ex-marine to roll into and start barking orders to his subordinates, Taos is it. Sometimes it takes a while for the world to intrude on a thick skull. In the case of Larry Whitten it took a village to borrow a phrase. And anyone who wants to tell me to sound the all clear race horn and dance for joy now that we've got a black guy in the white house should read this story very carefully and remember just how far we still have to go.

Welcome to Orchard Park NY -- Now when are you leaving?

Orchard Park is catching some heat lately for their long-standing rep as an enclave of snobbery and elitism. Strikes me there were always 2 Orchard Parks. There's a working people's OP and then there's this one. The other side is taking hits right now for trying to keep a retirement home of old poor people out. The OP Brahmin, or Quakers as I heard them called as a kid by non-Quaker residents of this fair burg, are all for having old folks retire there as long as they are Lacoste sweatered, Weejun shod, wide waled cord wearing Quakers just like them. But the plan was to allow less than desirables into the green zone of the OPCC, Eagle Heights, Birdsong and whatever other development has sprung from their regal soil. These are people whose experience with minorities consists of foreign doctors and Buffalo Bills so don't go asking them for any more diversity than they all ready have between Dr. Patel P.C.M.D. F.A.C.O.G. and Marshawn Lynch. It strikes me as hilarious that these folks are seriously trying to pretend that they aren't opposed in principle to old poor people as much as they are old poor people not from Jewett Holmwood Rd. Oh yeah I forgot they used to have Rick James as a neighbor too and maybe that was just a little too super freaky for them to countenance. That the village poses behind their mascot of a Quaker is of further ironic absurdity to the student of modern semiotics. What more diametrically opposed figurehead could this place cook up than an abolitionist, slave protecting, anti-war, anti-conflict Quaker ? Maybe they should switch to say, a Puritan or something equally fervent in its wrong-headedness and lack of compassion for the less fortunate.